valentine's

Layla worked hard on making her valentine's. Though, I think it is a good thing there are only 6 kids in her class. She got tired writing everyone's names.

But she loved the class celebration and getting a bag filled with valentine's love from her friends.

Perry made a similar homemade valentine. His favorite part was putting the stickers and candy inside the pocket.

The night before his school Valentine's celebration he sat down at the art table all by himself. He made this cute little decorated card and glued it onto his bag.

Kacin is kind of over valentine's. He only made these because I made him do something or he couldn't receive valentine's candy from his classmates. Ha!

We had a special valentine's breakfast sunday morning. Kyler and Kacin made each of us sweet valentine's and I gave each person a bag of candy bar cookies.

We spent the rest of that day at a special stake conference (that I actually got to listen to most of!) and then playing games and eating dessert and enjoying time with some good friends. And that made it an extra lovely valentine's day.

one long day

The alarm clock went off at 3:30am--the signal to start the day in order to make it to the airport at 5am.

If only we knew we could've slept a little longer because, at the scheduled boarding time, the flight would be delayed for an hour and a half. Of all flights, on the day we were on a tight schedule, it had to be our plane that got the "slowest most thorough maintenance worker" to change a battery the pilot had ever seen.

As soon as the plane took off, and we rose above the blanket of clouds, a most beautiful sunrise greeted us--daring me to believe that, even though we were off to a rocky start, the tightly scheduled day would still work out.

And the rest of the day was a whirlwind lacking in sleep and food, but spinning in decisions and paperwork, one right after the other.

Car rental, house design center, early childhood education tour, elementary school registration, junior high school registration, Eric's first walk through the model home and peek of our land.

Miraculously, and just barely thanks to a nice office worker who unlocked the school door so we could come in, everything on our checklist was completed.

Which left us with an hour to grab a cake and make it for a birthday surprise.

Our time was too short to celebrate her birthday properly, but some minutes was better than no minutes.

We headed back to the airport to catch our flight home. We arrived safely to a house of sleeping children just before midnight.

sunday: 1pm-4pm

These are not my good running shoes.

That doesn't bother this kid. In fact, maybe he prefers it that way.

Oh man, he was on one Sunday afternoon during church. Can you tell?

(selfies he took while talking and growling)

Even distracting him with my phone was not working during sacrament meeting.

So we walked the halls. Except he did more running than walking. Which would be fine, if the running wasn't for the purpose of opening the fire extinguisher cases and pulling the fire extinguishers (btw the ones at our church building need to be LOCKED), or escaping out into the parking lot, or ripping papers off of the bulletin boards.

There were moments of reprieve, like when I convinced him, even though at first he said "no kids", to come in with me into the other wards nursery to play for a few minutes. And when he took the task to try and open all of the cupboards to see which were locked and which were open.

But mostly he was hyper and ornery and much too big for me to grab and carry without tweaking my back. Which I did anyways and paid for it.

I was looking forward to primary. But he refused to go. There was more running away and even some knocking chairs over during the opening prayer. I sat with him. I pulled out my phone again. His primary teacher tried to coax him over. No go. It became apparent it was time to make our exit.

Once out in the halls again, he escaped my grasp. Oh I wished I had my running shoes on. I was pretty close to shouting down the hall for someone down there to block him. But my respect for social norms and quiet voices in the church building got the better of me. Though I made a vow to myself that if I ever see a little one running down the hall and the parent trying really hard to catch them, I would help them out, not step to the side so the little can run by.

My long legs and funny high heel run saved me instead and I was able to grab him just as he was stepping out of the foyer onto the sidewalk.

Eric finally finished with something he was asked to do for primary and took his turn with Perry. And so they sat in the car for over an hour.

I just needed to breathe. In and out. In and out.

We were at the end of sunday school and I waited in the hall for RS to start. I was talking with the RS president (a dear friend of ours). She had seen Perry bite me the week before and so she was asking about that and other Perry related and life things. And as we talked the things she said both validated my buried feelings and worried me for our future. And that's when I burst into tears.

I am really good at ugly crying. Red faced, snotty nosed big sobs are my specialty. And so I excused myself to join Eric and Perry in the car for awhile.

Once my face wasn't quite so red and puffy, I went back into relief society and soaked in a lesson on joy. How could I find joy in that day and that moment?

Well, it hit me that I felt a big dose of joy in the fact that I am part of a women's organization, called Relief Society, in which I felt comfortable enough to walk late into the room with crying puffy eyes and associate with some pretty amazing, caring, insightful women. I remembered how just a few months earlier when I was talking to my Relief Society president friend in the hall, it was she who burst into tears over some things going on in her own life. I felt grateful for Relief Society and the bonds it creates between women, who are varied in age, experience, talents, and abilities, but who are united in serving our Heavenly Father and developing charity and acting on it. In providing a little relief to each other and helping each other get through hard things. I don't have to put on a show or pretend to have it all together to be in that room with those sisters. I felt better by the end of the lesson and ready to keep going on.

And Perry was feeling better after his long break in the car, too.

And the world carried on.

Though, next sunday at 1pm, I might be showing up in the ever so fashionable pair of Nike's and a skirt.

Just like his brothers

I think I mentioned before that Kyler and Kacin have been into Legos lately. Specifically, that they have been into making working Lego candy machines. They watch video tutorials on you tube and make their creations.

One day, when the Legos were out, Perry sat down by the Lego bag with the ipad in hand. On his own, he pulled up a Lego tutorial on you tube. With the video playing on the floor beside him, just like he'd seen his older brothers do before, he built his own Lego candy machine. How sweet and wonderful to see him trying to do something just like his older brothers!

When he was finished he asked me to get some candy out for him. He had a spot in the middle to put the m&ms. Then he placed the Legos back on top to close it off.

His very own candy machine now sits on his shelf.

One more thing. He sure loves those older brothers of his. I was talking to Perry about the new house. I told him he could have his own bedroom. He doesn't want that though. He insists he will share with his brothers.

thoughts about our decision

Since embarking on this new adventure (the one called picking up and moving to Arizona), we have asked ourselves many, many times if we are making the right decision.

I don't know the answer yet. But I sure hope so.

My thoughts keep swirling around our decision and happiness--on being content and being intentional.

I have found, and so I believe, you can find and choose happiness. Even when you are crammed into a small living space, stuck in a job you don't like, or living on a tight budget. There is power in contentment--in finding peace and happiness with just what you have. Instead of always dreaming about the next best thing, you can live happily with what you have in that moment, no matter your circumstances. I think, with a little effort, we can train ourselves to shift our thoughts so we feel content and satisfied. And that is a good feeling.

I have had to do just that over the last few years with some things in our life. Some things just haven't gone as I imagined. We were dealt a hand and we have had to figure things out and make things work and learn to be happy and content even when things were less than ideal. There have been big things and little things (like all three boys crammed into one bedroom--some days that's a little thing and some days that's a big thing to deal with).

I have worked really hard on changing my mindset and my attitude and, most days, I have learned to be satisfied and happy just as we are right now.

But I've always been a firm believer in living intentionally, in fighting for the things you really want, and going out and making it happen.

How can we both feel the peace and satisfaction of being content and, yet, live intentionally? Is one way of living better than the other? Or do they go hand in hand?

I'm not sure.

Eric and I spend our money differently than some of our friends. I'm not saying we are better or worse, but the fact of the matter is that different families use their money on different things because of their particular family culture, priorities, and goals. We have things that are important to us so we spend more in those areas and things we spend less on because it is not a priority for us.

Maybe it's similar to that. We can't have everything at once and so we prioritize. We learn to be content with some things and live intentionally in other areas. And that might change a little at different times in our lives.

Are we making the right decision?

We could probably be happy and make it work no matter where we are. There is good and bad no matter what and we can learn to focus in on the good more often than the bad. But when we think about what we really want for our family right now it leads us to choose to take a step in the dark and live our own intentional adventure.

These Days

Layla's preschool class went on a field trip to Central Market. It was probably the best field trip I've ever been on. That had a little to do with the fact that we ended up with 4 quiet kids and three moms (two of the kids couldn't make it last minute). But, also, we had an awesome tour guide and we walked away after an interesting and fun tour of the entire store with chocolate bars, oranges, cookies, fresh peanut butter, cheese samples, and snapdragons.

One afternoon, Layla had the play-do out. I ordered a cake from her. She made me the most beautiful play-do cake there could be, with blueberries on top. She told me it would be $20. I reached my arm out to give her my imaginary money. She told me, "Mom, I don't need pretend ones. Give me real ones."

Whenever I tell Perry something and he doesn't agree with me, he adds "Dad says" in his protest. For example, just yesterday we went out to the car and his booster seat was in a different place because I gave one of Layla's friends a ride. I asked him if he could sit in it in the spot it was at, but he wanted the car seat back where he usually sits. So he told me "Dad says, put it in the back." And then this morning when it was time to get ready for school, he told me "dad says" he needed to build a batman lego car instead. Because what dad says goes.

Kacin and Kyler have been building cool Lego machines. These are candy dispensers they made. They actually work when you stick a penny in. Sure beats the Lego walls I made as a kid.

While Kyler and Kacin were at piano lessons, Perry and Layla and I walked through some of the old neighborhood trails. It made me a little nostalgic for the days back when we first moved to Washington and Kyler, Kacin, and I would spend hours each week walking these very same trails and riding bikes through the neighborhood.We would even take family walks around that spot on Sundays. Kyler and Kacin were just a little older than Perry and Layla are now. As Layla and Perry found perfect sticks and pretended to fight bad guys in the woods, I could picture Kyler and Kacin running around doing the same thing 5 years ago. So many wonderful memories were unlocked by this place that I haven't been to in years.

Once we move away, there is so much about this area that I am going to miss. There is so much beauty here, not only in the scenery, but in the people too. We have been so blessed to live and grow here for awhile.

Arizona . . . here we go!

Wonderful Eric gave me a trip to Arizona for Christmas. I flew in to Phoenix on a Thursday night and back to Seattle on a Monday night. I had plenty of time to soak in time with family, relax, and  . . . do some house shopping!!

It was not the intention of the trip when Eric got me the tickets. But as we've been praying the last few months, it's been on our minds that the timing is right to move back to Arizona. So we figured I should look around while we were down there.

I was so happy I got to visit with Grandma Mary and Grandpa Allen, snuggle my new nephew, Grayson, and spend time with my other cute nephew and niece, Jacqui, Josh, and my parents.

Spending time with all of these great people just reaffirmed to me how wonderful it would be to live close to them again.

In between seeing all those people, and hiking and eating lots of food, we looked at new builds and houses with Jacqui's realtor (Jacqui is looking for a house, too). 

Now from our previous internet searching, Eric and I had each been individually drawn to a particular area. When I checked it out, I found a new build that we felt would be just right for us.

And, like a dream, before we knew it, we were signing a contract and wiring money and starting the house building process.

Other minute details, like a source of income, will be sorted out later. Doesn't everyone buy a house and then find a job?

Yes, it seems a bit crazy to us, too. But it feels right and we trust that it will all work out. And if it doesn't right away, we have back up plans.  

It feels a bit strange being so adventurous, but there have been a lot of small promptings these last few months to the point that we feel good about our decision. 

So in 6-7 months time, we will be moving into a house similar to this.

We will spend the next few weeks making all of the fun decisions on the design of the home.

And then we will wait, excitedly, for the day when we will be back under the Arizona sunshine.