bug catching

I subbed in Layla Belle's kindergarten class yesterday. I loved watching her interact with the other students and follow the classroom routines so precisely. 

But my favorite was when we were outside and I brought some of the students into the garden. I overheard Layla telling another boy, "Isn't my mom so nice because she lets us find bugs?" And we found all sorts of bugs! Layla was in heaven digging in the dirt and placing her treasured bugs into her jar.

 

   

a castle

I woke up this morning thinking about how much time I have spent between dr.'s offices this last week. Thankfully nothing too serious around here! Just allergists, eye drs, check ups, and labs for different family members. But I have spent 10 hours with all of these various drs in a span of one week!

Kacin needed a ride to school today so he could turn in his castle project. He worked with a friend over the last few weeks to make this football themed castle.

 

   

These Days

 

Eric is back home from his business trip and life is just so much better when he is around. I'm so grateful for cell phones so we can stay connected when he is away, but talking and family prayers are just not the same over the phone.

 

I don't know if I've mentioned this on here, but Eric started a new job over a month ago. I think in the long run it was a good decision for our family to accept this new position, but I was mourning for a few weeks when it hit me that Eric was really leaving microsoft. I don't know why exactly, but I felt such an attachment to microsoft. Maybe it was because of all the family picnics we went to there or because of the amazing benefits that allowed us four weeks together after our adoption and to build up our savings and never worry about anything medical. Mostly I just felt so much gratitude for the company that made it possible for us to move back to Arizona. But it was time to make a change and we are grateful Eric found the job he did.

 
I stayed up too late last night at my article group (like a book club but instead of reading a book we read an article or listen to a TED talk or whatever). We were discussing a documentary we watched on PBS called "The Bad Kids." I am so glad I watched it! And I love getting together with those ladies and talking about interesting topics, and what's going on in our own lives.

 

I was talking to a friend the other day with three little kids. I think her oldest is in second grade. She mentioned something about how much time I must have to myself with my kids all in some kind of school. Ha! It is amazing how that "free time" fills up so quickly to the point that I am always playing catch up. And probably part of it is also that with older kids, my evenings have become busier than ever and we all get to bed later than I would like which means less time for me to do things in the evenings like I used to.

 

I have a gazillion pictures on my phone waiting for me to sort through. Here is to hoping that this is my week!

 

*all pictures in this post courtesy of Layla

today

We are still without internet today.

However, Layla and I accomplished something pretty wonderful. Something that needed to be done for quite some time. We cleaned the car! She loves her job as official vacuum-er. And then requested this picture once the task was done. 

 

And, also, by her request, once we were finished, we were off to the dinosaur museum.

 

 

blue nails

I wrote an entire blog post today. I finally had a chance to sit down at the computer. But before I could publish it, our internet went out. I haven't been able to get it working yet so blogging from my phone it is.

Without it, I have come to see how reliant on the internet we are--Perry wanted to play a video game, Kyler needed to finish some stuff for school, I had some bills to pay, etc And none of it could happen without our internet connection. 

Layla and I stopped at the library tonight after dropping Kacin off at practice. When we got there, I noticed her hands.

 

She had been working on art projects right before we left. Apparently, one of those art projects was giving herself blue nail polish (with dot markers). She has asked a few times over the last few days to paint her nails with nail polish, but we haven't had a chance to yet.  Well, she decided to take matters into her own hands. I remember doing this with crayons when I was little, but the markers are much bolder.

 

Put a Smile On Your Face #lifewithautism

After the ordeal, we stood up and noticed the plaque that stood across from the bench honoring a former volunteer.

  

How fitting. Looking back at that bench, at us, at the boys laughing good-naturedly, would anyone ever know our struggle here?

 

Let me set the scene here: A morning at the Phoenix zoo. When loading up the car, we had remembered to bring plenty of snacks and a cooler filled with cold drinks, but, alas, we left the stroller behind. It was a warm day, but we stayed cool with our drinks and made sure to take breaks in the shade. I carried Perry in my arms for awhile when his legs were getting tired. About an hour into our zoo visit, we were watching the Orangutans. They were just a few feet away from us and putting on quite a show--swinging from the ropes, climbing down, and we even saw a waterfall when one of them used the bathroom from her perch up high.

Then came the trigger: We had all been watching the orangutans with interest for a good long time. So Kacin politely asked, "Are you guys ready to go to the next animal?"

Nobody had planned for the aftermath: Apparently, that question didn't sit right with Perry. He walked right up to Kacin and got into his face and asked, "Do you want me to kill you?" I quickly moved my body to block his fist and redirect him back to the orangutans, reassuring him we could stay awhile longer if he wanted to. He moved away from Kacin, but continued to shout that Kacin was a bad guy. He still had a glare on his face, but a minute later he walked off on his own, still mumbling mean things about Kacin. Eric took the other kids down a different path out of the exhibit as I worked hard at distracting Perry with talk of animals and offerings of juice and snacks.

We made our way to a nearby bench in the outdoor courtyard between both sides of the orangutan exhibit. We found a bench to sit on and I deliberately positioned Perry right next to me on my left with Kyler and then Kacin on my right. Layla and Eric sat across from us. I passed out juice boxes and sandwiches to everyone. It seemed as though Perry had moved on and was feeling better.

Suddenly, he held up his juice box and threatened to squirt it at Kacin. When I didn't allow that one, he quickly began to squirt it into a puddle on the ground near his feet. I took the juice box away from him and offered him his cheeze-its and other snacks. That's when he began to point at Kacin and then gesture to the juice puddle while demanding that Kacin go get into that puddle (clearly as punishment for his wrongdoing).    

Kacin has a sense of humor and enjoys being a little bit snarky so he laughed and jumped up to dance in the puddle. I shooed Kacin back to his seat and while Perry still mumbled death threats and punch in the eyeball threats at Kacin, I tried to get everyone back to focusing on their lunch. I passed out go-gurts to everyone. Perry seemed a bit calmer, but when I went to give him his go-gurt he told me he was going to squirt it on Kacin. Well, I told him if that was the case he did not get a go-gurt. With a mischievous grin he told me he wouldn't, "I promise, mom." It's not like I believed that one, but after he pleaded a little more I conceded, as long as I was holding on to the package as he ate it. He took some yogurt into his mouth. He seemed calm and collected and I hoped he had moved on. He took more yogurt. And then I noticed he wasn't swallowing it.

All at once, before I could grab him, he jumped up and dashed to the other side of the bench where Kacin was sitting and proceeded to spit that mouthful of yogurt out aiming directly at Kacin. Luckily, he is not much of spitter, and the yogurt pretty much plopped straight down to the ground.

Enough was enough. Eric escorted Perry across the zoo to the exit while I let the other kids finish their lunch. When Perry and Eric were out of sight, Kacin and Kyler could not contain their laughter anymore. Soon we were all busting up laughing at the whole thing. "Get in the juice, Kacin! How dare you ask to see another animal!" The older boys kept cracking up about it during our entire walk back to the car.

And, of course, by the time we made it back to the car, Perry was all settled and didn't bring it up again for the rest of the day. (Though, we did make sure Kacin didn't sit in the back next to Perry.) But just as quickly as it starts, it eventually ends.

I don't know many families that have to endure death threats and attempted attacks from their sibling. But I'm so grateful that my kids have learned to have a good sense of humor, to forgive quickly, and to be understanding of their brother. It's not always an easy life for Perry and it's not easy for the rest of us, but we are Team Allred and we stick together.

So when I saw that plaque and the wise words of that dedicated volunteer, I was comforted by her words that yes, things will go wrong sometimes--unexpected and challenging things happen to all of us, especially with autism in your life--but we can put a smile on our faces because it's ok. It will be just fine.    

Wave Cave

Since all the kids are home for spring break, Eric took a day off work. We dropped Perry off at my sister's house and headed over to the Superstition Mountains.

It was a little on the warm side that day, and we left later than we planned, but other than that it was an absolutely beautiful time to be hiking in the desert. It was as a green as the desert can be and lovely wildflowers of purple, yellow, orange, and white were popping up all over the place.

 

Our destination was the Wave Cave. It is a trail that Eric and I had never been on before. We took this picture about 1/3 of the way from the top. 

 

Since we had never been there before, we had a little trouble finding the right trail to take and ended up hiking about 20 extra minutes along a different trail before we went back to find the correct path. We had to remind the whiners in the group that this was an adventure.

Eric carried Layla on his shoulders a few times, but the last half mile or so is pretty steep and so she had to get those 5 year old legs up there herself with just a little bit of help. It was not an easy hike for any of us, but she did it! Once we got to the top and into the cave we had a beautiful view looking out.

 

 

And a pretty cool view looking in.

 

 

But I would say the coolest view was looking up at everyone "riding" the wave.

 

  

  

 

Eric bowing to me. He knows his proper place. ;)

 

 

Our humorous attempt at a heart.

 

I'm not sure if this one is much better.

 

The way down was even more tricky for those little legs that kept slipping. This time we had to remind to have courage (part of our family theme this year!) and that we could do hard things. And we did it!

A hike like that always proves that we are stronger than we think we are. And a hike like that also needs to be followed by a stop at in-n-out for hamburgers and shakes.