a day on the rim

We took a drive and landed just outside of Payson, AZ on the Mogollan Rim to do a little off roading in my sister’s Ranger.

Kacin and kyler each drove up and down their first legit hill. They did so well!



Layla and Perry got behind the wheel, too. So fun to see their excitement about that. What a great uncle they have to give them driving lessons.

While we were on a long ride with Logan in the car, Jacqui organized a surprise party with a piñata to celebrate Log’s 6th birthday. Kyler and Eric were assigned the task of hanging the shark piñata from the top of a tree. I heard it was a little precarious, but in the end they got it up.

Piñata time! Brinn was a little bit nervous about those shark teeth.

But the others all happily took some big whacks on that thing.





Presents, cupcakes, and a little more off roading before we had to get home.




Big hugs to end the day!!

I’m just going to move it, mom

As soon as she spied E’s Diet Coke left unattended she started creeping her way over to it. When her hand reached for it, I asked her what she was doing. She told me “I’m just moving dad’s soda, mom.” That little sneaky girl didn’t fool me one bit, haha. I reminded her not to drink it. She hid her head and told me, “I know, mom.” I tried to persuade her that soda is yucky. She protested, “No, it’s not, mom.” 

Arizona escape room number 3*

Eric and I were talking about our bucket lists the other day and that led to a discussion of things we want to do together. We decided that one of them would be to try every escape room in the valley! We just love puzzling through escape rooms. We both do well with goals so we decided to take that idea and actually set a goal to go to 25 escape rooms. We recently went to two other rooms so we will count those towards our number goal. When we didn’t know what to do for date night tonight and we saw that escape rooms opened up again today after Covid-19 shut down orders, we decided to book one. 

We went to Puzzle Effect in Gilbert and successfully completed the Knight and Rook room with just over 6 minutes left. This room was linear. We don’t know if it was because this was the first time we’ve gone to one with just the two of us or not, but we found ourselves getting stuck more than we expected. One big hang up was because we mistakenly thought a pawn piece was called a rook. Haha. At this particular place, you don’t ask for clues, they just automatically give them to you when they see that you are stuck or when they see you aren’t making the time checks. The room was mostly puzzles to open locks around the room. But it was fun! And it was nice to get out of the house and use our brains again after pandemic quarantine brain.

Mountain Mamas

A friend persuaded me to give mountain biking a try. That is a fear that I haven’t faced since I crashed well over ten years ago when Eric and I thought we would start mountain biking together (after that crash, I was out). But she promised we would go slow and take it easy so I took a deep breath (well, lots of them) and faced my fear. Whew, I did it! I don’t like downhills or going fast, but I would be willing to go again in hopes that with every bit of experience I will get more comfortable.

After our mountain biking adventure, we started making plans for other outings like hiking, paddle boarding, and more mountain biking. Which led to our friend running with the idea of matching shirts for us “mountain mamas.” I went mountain biking once and now I have a club with matching shirts. Look at that! I love these ladies and glad they patiently, nonjudgmentally pushed me out of my comfort zone. Looking forward to more adventures with the mountain mamas! 

Mother’s Day 2020

I just finished reading a book about Mother Teresa, "Mother Teresa: a life inspired." I found it striking that over and over again it was stated that Mother Teresa's life and all that she stood for and did was influenced by her own mother. Her own mother had welcomed anyone and everyone who was hungry to sit with them around their kitchen table, teaching young Agnes that what one had was never so scarce that it could not be shared with someone in need. When Agnes didn't know who they all were, her mother told her "Some of them are our relations, but all of them are our people."  Essentially teaching her that all people no matter their background or beliefs are children of God. And everyone needs a place. Her mother's example sank deep into her heart. She knew that a woman of faith had enormous potential and could have a great impact on the world. Building her life on that foundation her mother offered her, Mother Teresa became a powerful influence for good--reshaping missionary work, promoting peace, and loving individuals one by one. She became who she was because of her mother.

When asked what someone could do to promote peace in the world, Mother Teresa answered "Go home and love your family."

Love them! Love them for all of their quirks, virtues, shortcomings, and strengths. Intentionally love them. For that is how we can find the greatest joy and purpose in life. Love the people that surround us. As mothers and women, I do believe our influence is greater than we can even imagine. That doesn't mean we need to be perfect. We will fail and we will mess up and most of us and our children will end up needing therapy at some point or another. But if the people around us know that we love them and they are children of God then that will make all of the difference.

How lucky I am to be home to love these people.

My little family made me feel extra loved this mother's day. It started with breakfast in a special pink blanket draped chair. As we ate our meal, I got to share with them some of what I had read about mother Teresa.

Then they each blessed me with some very thoughtful cards and gifts. Their words brought me to tears! Their gifts were so individual and beautiful to me.

My favorite part of the day was our home church. Eric asked each of the kids to share something I have taught them and how it has strengthened their testimony or brought them closer to Christ. Their messages of the Savior brought more tears to my eyes. 

Motherhood is humbling and challenging, yet incredible and beautiful. I felt very loved today and I hope they know how much I love them back.

Disney parade

One of my friends had been planning to take their son to Disneyland to celebrate his birthday. With the shut down because of covid-19, their plans were canceled. But Lori is a super mom and organized a Disney parade for him to help celebrate the day.  We decked out our truck and went with a Disney characters of the water theme. Ariel, a shark, Moana, Maui, Captain Jack Sparrow, and his pirate friend all waved to Carter to wish him a happy birthday.

Tattooing Kyler with permanent marker and eyeliner is always a good time.

They thought Torani syrup was a nice touch for the drunken pirates.

I wish I had gotten a good picture of some of the others at the parade...the best i got was flounder on rollerblades. But someone else made the incredicosater and that was cool, too. I love seeing such creativity!

We ate them before I took a picture, but Lori passed out the cutest Mickey Mouse cookies to everyone who came by. It was fun to get out of the house and do something creative to wish a friend happy birthday. Not quite Disneyland, but almost as good and I hope he had a great day.

Trauma and connection

I recently took a couple of trainings through zoom from Prevent Child Abuse Arizona. I listened to a lot of fascinating stuff about ACEs (Adverse Childhood Experiences) and parenting. Around 61% of people have had at least one ACE. ACEs can include witnessing or experiencing violence, abuse, or neglect and growing up in a home with substance abuse, mental health problems, or instability. ACEs have far lasting effects and literally rewire the brain. As adults, we may also experience various traumas. During the training, I made a single note (and now I can't remember if it is something she said or a thought I had, because, hey, I'll take the credit if I can...haha). It was this:

The antidote to trauma is connection.

There's not often a magic answer to the challenges of life, but I think that comes pretty close.

As humans, we NEED to feel love and belonging. And after trauma or ACEs we might struggle to regulate ourselves and sometimes that leads to unhealthy ways of coping. However, the best way to heal is through positive connection.

I would argue that means connection with other supportive, good for us people, connection with nature, connection with ourselves, and connection with God.

Little children don't need time-outs, they need time-ins.
Teenagers who are struggling need more time with us to feel love.

In general, we all need people who will get in there with us, listen to us, and look us in the eyes and be a safe place over and over again for as long as we need.
We all need time to connect to mother nature--to breathe in fresh air, wonder at the beauty of the world, and to put things in perspective. Nature is the best place to put things into perspective.
We, also, need to connect to ourselves and our own self worth. To notice what we like or don't like, what we need and don't actually need, and recognize the thoughts and feelings that flow through us without passing judgment on ourselves. We need to decide who it is we want to be and try to figure out what our personal mission and purpose is.
Most importantly, we need to connect with God. Through sincere prayer and scripture study. Through song or meditation. When we connect with a loving Heavenly Father and turn to Him, we will heal.

Things to think on:
How can I heal my own personal traumas through connection? Is there someone I should talk to (therapist, friend, God)? Is there something I should do to get to know myself better? How can I take time in nature this week? What are the thoughts that run through my head and how do I feel?

How can I help someone else heal through connection? Can I listen without judgement? Is there someone I could spend more time with? How can I show more love? How can I inspire someone to connect with God or with nature?

Because the antidote to trauma is connection.



Slightly related, but on a side note...Layla and I met some friends for a lovely hike at the Wind Cave trail.

Connect with people.
Connect with nature.
Connect with ourselves.
Connect with God.